They are the source of laughter for many and disgust for others. They can make or break a friendship, and be the cause many a rift in a relationship. And, for some reason, they are the most unbearable from either your dad or your dog. Of course, I am talking about farting.
Whether you call it flatulence, farting, trumping, tooting or passing gas – we all do it. But seriously, I’m one of those guys who just cannot see the funny side in farts. Call me delicate, my friends farting in the car and keeping the windows rolled up is just not my idea of ‘funny’.
I’m also in one of those relationships where we absolutely do not fart in front of each other, and if we do let one slip, it must be met with great shame. I simply wouldn’t survive in any other kind of relationship. Because farts are disgusting and for those of you who think I’m overreacting, just think of this; when you’re smelling somebody else’s fart, you literally have particles that were in their ass on your tongue. Need I say anymore?
But my main reason for hating farts is the fact they f***ing stink. However, what if that wasn’t the case? What if, say, your farts could literally smell like a bouquet of roses? Well, according to this company, they can.
Lutin Malin is a French company that produces ingestible capsules they claim will make your flatulence smell like roses. But that’s not the only aroma you can have coming out of your bottom. The company also sells pills that can make your farts smell of violet, ginger, and – most popular of all – chocolate!
This is no medicine or drug, according to the website, they are simply a “dietary supplement based on natural ingredients” – or what is known as “phytotherapy” and according to their site, they have been doing this since 2007, and their many returning customers prove these pills do, in fact, work:
“The Fart Pill is the result of lengthy research and trials and is on sale since 2007. Our fragrant variants also add a touch of humour for any occasion. “Our numerous returning customers are no doubt the best proof.”
Each individual sachet includes 60 pills, and customers are informed to take “2 to 6 capsules per day at meal times, depending on one’s condition, diet and the desired effect”. And each pachet costs just $17.19! (A bargain, in my opinion.) and just when you thought all your dreams had been answered, the company also make a powder for dogs. Legit. You just sprinkle the powder onto your pooch’s food and their usually smelly farts will smell of roses.